The Capacity To Be Alone Is The Capacity To Love!

“The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love! It may look paradoxical to you, but it’s not. It’s an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person without possessing  the other,without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be happy as much as they are now. Their happiness cannot be taken away by the other, because it is not given by the other.”

                                                                                                                                                ~Osho

 

To let this existential truth manifest in our lives, we need to have good connection with our inner self first, only then can one truly connect with others at the core level. This helps in building a solid foundation.

Try to understand yourself at all levels and discover your true inner self. Other’s view about you are just assumptions. No one knows you more than you yourself. Take time to get to know your subconscious self and decipher it. This can be achieved through constant awareness and deep meditation.

Who is the real ‘you’ behind yourself,Try to know this!

And then only can you Rebuild a bridge to that reality that resides deep within you, which gets hidden due to the constant suppression by negative thinking , stress and worrying.

 

“The desire for connection with the Divine and our formless inner self is at the foundation of all desire for human connection.”    

                                                                                                  ~Donna Goddard

                                                                            

What are your views? Do share them in the comment section below !

 

Miracle

 

Each Breath we take is a miracle in itself. To experience a miracle, we don’t need to walk on water or fly in air. The real miracle is with us- the breath we take. Each moment of our lives, we can feel the wonder of being alive.

How wondrous breath is. BREATH IS LIFE !

Pay attention, be aware of and feel the gratitude for each breath you take. This will clear your mind like a calm river.

Inhalation and exhalation of breath is breathing.

How amazing is the system which governs our breathing mechanism. It almost happens unconsciously without any effort. BUT we all know how important breathing is!

Technically, it is important as our cells constantly need new supply of oxygen to produce energy which is supplied through breathing only. Without oxygen, cell damage and cell death will occur.

This is the one threshold which divides between BEING and NON-BEING, between existing and non-existing.

The way we breathe effects a lot of our conditions-our health, our emotions, our immune systems and state of mind.

EACH EMOTION HAS A CORRESPONDING  RHYTHM OF BREATH.

Have you noticed, how your breathing becomes fast and heavy when you are scared or highly stressed.

According to scientific research, our breathing pattern impacts our health in innumerable ways. Some are-

• Shallow breathing leads to lower oxygen levels in the body, which results in increased inflammation, reduced immunity and higher anxiety. It can also impair brain function as brain needs more oxygen compared to other major organs.
• Shortness of breath and heart diseases are linked.
• Poor breathing can lead to sleep problems and high blood pressure.
• 5 breaths per resting minute is a parameter for good health.

So, focus on breathing in a natural, calm way to achieve optimal health.

Stay Healthy !  Stay Happy !

 

 

prompt: Breath

Different Types Of Meditation

 

What is Meditation?  Click Here to know more.

Different types of meditation:

1. Concentration meditation
2. Mindfulness meditation
3. Reflective meditation
4. Heart centered meditation
5. Creative meditation

 

(1) Concentration meditation:

Concentration is the central motto of all types of meditation, but in some techniques, main focus is only on building concentration. One needs to train the mind to focus and concentrate on nothingness or on an object in order to cut distractions. This helps in calming the mind. There are many types of concentration meditation techniques which help to gain concentration by overcoming distractions within and outside your mind to sustain mental focus.

Some of them are:-

a) Zen Meditation

b) Transcendental Meditation

c) Om Meditation

d) Samadhi Meditation

e) Chakra Meditation

 

 

(2) Mindfulness meditation:

This is one of the most powerful of all techniques. In this, the emphasis is on cultivating a highly receptive mindful attention towards any object or action within your sphere of influence. This meditation helps to learn to pay attention or be “mindful”. This is a great tool to overcome depression and anxiety. It can also provide pain relief .

Different techniques in this category are -:

a) Vipassana Meditation

b) Deep Breathing Meditation

c) Mindful Breathing Meditation

d) Walking Meditation

e) Sitting Meditation

 

(3) Reflective meditation:-

This type of meditation promotes disciplined thinking. In this, one has to choose a question, topic or theme and reflect upon it or analyse it. Hence, it is also called as analytical meditation. In the initial stages, when your thoughts wander to other topics, you need to discipline your mind to return to the chosen topic or question. In order to discipline the mind, one needs to have strong concentration.

After regular practice, thoughts will not wander off and your mind will be more in control. This is an important type of meditation to achieve calmness of mind. It also provides inner strength and conviction to transform your life by having control on your thoughts and mind .

Some questions you can choose to focus on-:

a) Who am I? What is my true nature?

b) What is the real purpose of my life?

c) What is my role in this universe?

d) How can I help eliminate or reduce suffering of others?

 

(4) Heart Centered meditation:-

This meditation is also know as Heart Chakra Meditation. In this, the focus is on radiance of love, kindness and compassion. Over time, practice of this meditation helps to heal the heart by releasing all fears and sadness by opening the heart chakra and removing any negative energy present there. One feels calm and very peaceful after doing this meditation. The goal is to increase the awareness of Divine Love. This helps to increase the emotional and physical well being of a person. It helps in coping with stressful experiences. 

 

(5) Creative Meditation:-

This form of meditation helps you to cultivate and strengthen different qualities of your mind such as appreciation, joy, compassion, patience, humility, empathy, fearlessness, tenderness and may other. This is done through visualization done as per guidance through an audio or the visual medium. Visualization can help in bringing about major changes. This technique helps to get rid of negativity and problems that act as blocks in achieving the desired state of self.

 

Generally, the meditations which are commonly  practiced are a combination of two or more of the above mentioned techniques.

Hope this helps you to know about different ways of meditation. Choose the technique which you are comfortable doing and which resonates with you. This will be the most beneficial and effective for you.

Learning any meditation under the guidance of a knowledgeable teacher is the best way to experience it. Meditation will definitely help you to Refresh and reinvent yourself.

 

I would love to know your meditation experiences. Please share them in the comment section below !

What Is Meditation ?

 

The word Meditation, is formed from two Latin words:

meditari ( to think, to dwell upon, to exercise the mind)

and

mederi ( to heal)

There are several definitions given for meditation and what it is. Here i will write based on my personal understanding and experience of practicing it.

Generally, it is considered that meditation is based on worshiping or prayer. It is not so!

Meditation to me is awareness. Meditation means to shift our awareness inwards, to explore, observe and communicate with our true inner self. It is turning inwards to free yourself from the chaos and distraction of the external world and constant chatter of your own brain.

Meditation is a technique to attain a state of consciousness, where the mind is free of scattered thoughts and their repeated patterns. In such a state, all the activity of the brain is reduced to one.

While meditating, when some thoughts come to your mind, don’t focus on them, don’t react to them, just observe them i.e. just be a Witness  and let them pass, let go.

Meditation is a means of transforming the mind. With regular practice of proper techniques, the consciousness can be expanded to a great extent and you can easily reach state of deep meditation.

WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF MEDITATION ?

There are numerous benefits of meditation which have been proven by scientific studies. Here i will list some major ones:

1. Enhances emotional well being- one learns to be more calm, less anxious and fearful. Meditation also helps in decreasing depression.

2. Enriches your Soul, by guiding us towards our true essential nature of happiness, love and joy

3. Improved concentration levels

4. Attainment of Enlightenment or Supreme Bliss.

5. Reduction in stress level.

6. Improved general health and increased energy level, leading to more efficiency.

7. Improved immune system.

HOW MANY TYPES OF MEDITATIONS ARE THERE ?

Meditation techniques can be classified broadly under these five categories:

1. Concentration Meditation

2. Mindfulness Meditation

3. Reflective Meditation

4. Heart-centered Meditation

5. Creative Meditation

In my next post i will elaborate on different types of meditation.

BE BLESSED !

Overcome The Setbacks !

 

We always get into something thinking it to be the best. Later, if we get into trouble or if the outcome is not according to our anticipated success or fulfillment, we feel crushed with regret.

We keep thinking and brooding about the negative instance in form of mistake for a long time. It even pops up in our mind without invitation to create unwanted ripples time and again.We feel helpless and hopeless. We seem to be lost on our way to the planned destination. These flashbacks to the experience, traumatise us often in the quietness of late hour.

Why is it so?

The reason could be our attachment to the ego and its inconsequential desires. Our ego feels good when it’s desires are getting fulfilled. When this does not happen, it tends to deviate towards sadness and depression. We get disappointed and regret our decisions. Our mental web of thoughts traps us and consumes us.

Also, our mind keeps going back to what has hurt our self-esteem. Certain negative experiences drain us emotionally by affecting us mentally and physically. We all have situations that go wrong. Setbacks or mistakes are inevitable in everyone’s life. Life does not always turn up the way we expect. But it is sheer  ignorance to slip into remorse again and again. As someone has rightly said “Worry is a misuse of power of imagination”.

How do we take ourselves forward by forgetting the mistakes or setbacks?

The right way would be to see things in a positive light. Realize that mistakes are part and parcel of life. Every mistake is an experience which come to teach us a lesson. At the moment, it might seem to be most disappointing and regretful but over the course of time it imparts the most valuable lesson. It might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to us. We should learn from errors of judgement. If we fail, we can always try again in a much better way.

Be objective to the real situation. Retrain your mind to focus on the best that has come out of the situation. Chose the thoughts with awareness to meet our need of healthy living. Our brain needs help to defeat the negative inner chatter. By maintaining a journal of our negative thoughts, we can find out what triggers them. Stop negative self-talk as soon as it starts.

Try not to over-exaggerate the feeling of sadness. Consider it just a feeling like any other. Stop wallowing in self pity.  Thoughts are not always facts; they can be just figments of our over active imagination and could be way far from reality at times. The more you focus on the negative thoughts, the more power you give them.

Practice forgiveness and gratitude to be really positive. Forgive yourself for not being perfect. We are human, not God. Forgive others, to maintain the peace of your mind. Let past remain in the past. Don’t let it control your present or future. Stop overthinking. What’s done is done! Life goes on.

Believe, you can do better in the future. Turn setbacks into fuel for self growth.

REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK!

 

Inevitable

LOVE IS BETTER WHEN YOU LAUGH TOGETHER!

Image courtesy: http://www.familyfriendpoems.

 

“We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh”

~Agnes Repplier

 

 

Laughter or GSOH (Good Sense Of Humor) is a very important ingredient in any close relationship. In matters of the heart, it is more so and cannot be overlooked at any cost.

 

Humor often serves as an ice-breaker. It helps in making two people comfortable with each other. In the starting phase of any romantic relationship, a sense of humor helps a person to relax in the presence of a new person by reducing awkwardness, stress or tension. This results in speeding up the process of closer psychological bonding. A person looks forward to meeting the partner who is jovial and witty in anticipation of good and cheerful times together.

 

Attraction, admiration and appreciation can bring two people together in the beginning but  humor injects new life into the relationship and  ‘keeps’ them together and makes the relationship stable and long-lasting.

 

It is said that ‘A woman will always love a man who makes her laugh’ and rightly so. Seems like women instinctively understand the value of a witty suitor and are hardwired to appreciate humor.

 

When two people can often share a good laugh together, this shows they are intellectually and emotionally on the same page. Also there are no pretensions what so-ever. It means you don’t have to be always on an artificial “alert” mode in the front of your partner but can relax and not hesitate to show your goofy-side sometimes and have fun.

 

The resulting comfortable environment leads to open-hearted, free,uninhibited interactions filled with joy. It helps in bringing the couple closer. Therefore, it is no coincidence that the couples who ‘laugh together’, stay together. They are more accepting of each others’ mistakes and forgive readily.

 

In love relationships, humor also helps to develop trust in the partners as it is noticed that when someone can indulge in impromptu, unplanned sessions of good laughter, this indicates that he is not calculative, not hypocritical or has not put on a false persona. He is not afraid of showing his true nature and self. This builds a lot of trust, which is the most important thing in any relationship. Without it no relationship can move forward or stay stable even if all other positive aspects are over-abundant.

 

The person who enjoys a good laugh is stress-free and helps in bringing the stress level of the other person down. Take lack of humor as ‘red flags’ in any relationship. If your instincts warn you,trust them!

 

Laughter is contagious. The good cheer spreads to the other partner as well, making both partners calm, happy and positive minded. They can make light of virtually every situation. This keeps the relationship fresh and lifts your spirits.

 

When one has a good sense of humor, it often means that the person does not take himself extra seriously and can enjoy the funnier side of life.Humor helps to cope with the ups and downs of worldly existence .

 

On a personal note, I remember there had been this particular difficult phase when I was ill and had to undergo surgery, the continuous good cheer and sense of humor of my partner acted like a soothing balm on my distressed nerves. It helped greatly in keeping the atmosphere light. I was able to cope with the fear and pain in a better way to overcome the challenge with the constant supportive dose of  his witty jokes and one-liners.This helped to divert my mind away from the problem and suffering.

 

There could also be a scientific basis for this as medical research has proven that “Sometimes, just lowering the stress level of the body can help immensely with the perception of pain.” Laughter lowers the stress level and also helps in release of natural pain killers in blood.

 

Based on my experience,I can say-When someone takes care of you with a smile on his face along with musical strains of laughter in his voice, ‘REJOICE’ as this is the greatest gift you will ever receive.

 

It is said that “HAPPINESS isn’t a destination. It is present in the journey.” Any relationship is a journey. Laughter makes this journey much more worthwhile, happy and long-lasting as new bonds are formed and amends are made on the way when you have funny anecdotes to share with each other.

Learning to laugh a little more just may save a relationship and cement it forever.

Keep the punch-lines coming!

 

 

“This post is a part of #LoveAndLaughter activity at BlogAdda in association with Caratlane.”

RELIVING THOSE MOMENTS!

If I Could Turn Back Time

If you could return to the past to relive a part of your life, either to experience the wonderful bits again, or to do something over, which part of you life would you return to? Why? #DailyPrompt

 

Some moments become the most positive influence in our life which we want to revisit again and again.We cherish the lessons and gifts these moments brought us- forever.

Sometimes unfounded fears are the reasons which stop us from taking those chances that you lament later and revisit those moments once in a while .

We fail to understand why certain events happened the way they did.We  tend to analyze and over-analyze them looking for some plausible conclusions and reasons even after decades have passed by.

 

 

 

 

 

Was it all really so beautiful as we visualize it in our mind’s eye after ages or is it so only in the illusions we build as a result of filtering mechanism applied to our stock of memories .

As we grow and become more mature,we are armed with new understanding of issues providing us new view-points.Then, are our interpretations about the past accurate and exact or influenced by selective perceptual defense mechanism.Thus presenting before us the rosy visions we want to imagine?

Perhaps yes ; Perhaps no!

Image courtesy: internet sources

If I Could Turn Back Time